What is a City to Us Without Money? Merely a Walled Garden

Kay
November 21st, 2022

With money, a city is luxury and attractions. Without money, a city is a walled garden.



There’s a fair amount to do in the city. Many food places. You could go on meetup and socialise with those new to the city. You could enjoy the markets. Fine foods. Gelato or fish and chips by the harbour. Scenic seaplane tours or a cruise to nearby islands. So so much to do, yet so little time to experience them all. That is, if you had money. $20 meals. $10 drinks. $10 gelato. $200 for seaplanes or $150 for cruise tours.

  What’s a city without money? When your budget allows for a single meal out each week, with no entree or drink. You walk around and see all the sights, the things to do, only to come upon the sad realisiation that they’re walled off to you. Look at that awesome cruise, or that magnificent museum. Both of which you can only stare upon at a distance. Wishing. Hoping to go. So desperate, you want to befriend a rich old couple for a boat cruise..

  Thus, a city is simply the embodiment of sadness. Everywhere your eyes reach is somewhere you can never touch. The city, the central hub that has access to nearly everything. Cuisines of the world. Tourist attractions for days. Music and Arts. Everything someone could want. But not for you, the poor beggar.

  Then what is the city to a poor man, one without funds? The only source of enjoyment would be a few places without admission fee, usually funded by the government. Beyond that would be nature and hikes. These usually aren’t common in larger cities, for by necessity they sprawl outwards and consume all in their sights. Not even mountains are safe. I write this as I live upon a mountain, 145 meters above ground level, where everywhere my eyes can see is a mountains filled with houses on the edges of the summit.



This ongoing capitalist society has divided society, between those who have funds, and can afford luxuries and enjoyments that money brings. And those who have nothing, where not even nature is safe anymore. Welcome to our world.

Constant New Cities: Resetting Connections: Death Stranding; Death Stranded...

Kay
October 16th, 2022

I Am Death Stranded. Every friendship dies off when moving to the next city. Then what can make friendships stand the test of time?

  Death stranding, a game that has heavy philosophical ties of connecting with others and how, if we’re alone, without connections, the world is worse off. Each time I move to a brand new city, because I’m only staying in each city a short time, past friendships aren’t strong enough to withstand the test of time. It’s almost like a backpacker at a hostel, you meet with others there and make temporary friends. You go places, hang out, all knowing that whenever one of you leave, that relationship fades away.

  In the anime, Heroines run the show, the main character made 3 connections within the first few days. In contrast, it’s been 3 weeks since I moved to a new city and haven’t made a single strong connection. Friendships are strengthened with time and meetups. Without both, those relationships will fade by the time you visit that city again. I met someone interesting at a friend’s wedding and had an enjoyable chat, so I invited him out for board games. Board games, usually with 4-6 people, are deeply impersonal. All conversations are group ones and 1-1 chats are few and far between. Even though I might be fine arranging another meetup in a year from now, would he? In the end, I was just someone he chatted to at a wedding and played some board game with. That’s the extent of our relationship.

  As I travel around, what is it that could make relationships last? Is it interests? Activities? Personality? Philosophy? There was a theory that, since we’re mammals and always grouped up for survival, friendships form within those groups to help us survive. When we leave the pack, those existing friendships no longer help us survive, thus die off. How many times have seemingly great relationships died because you left the pack? That is school, university, moving workplaces or moving away from your current city? At my previous workplace, I had a colleague with similar thoughts as myself, even then, our relationship became non-existent as soon as I left.

  Reene Brown mentioned being vulnerable with others and how that can form stronger connections. Without being vulnerable to some degree, relationships stay superficial. Where everything’s on the surface layer of “positive vibes”. Real talk can advance a shallow connection to one that can stand the test of time. After that, instead of being seen as a mere bundle of interests, you can be seen as who you truly are.

  I used to be good buddies with someone from school, but it started to fade away after he no longer played the same game and school ended. It was only after we talked about philosophies of life, sharing our similar thoughts and myself being vulnerable did the relationship turn solid. Now, even as we both live in different cities, I believe that a meetup would be met with open arms, whether it’s a year or decade from now.

  Too bad those deep conversations are difficult, especially since meeting new people, without common connections, is difficult. Soon enough, my journey will continue around the world. But, I wonder if, by the end of this journey, I’d be death stranded. All my connections in previous cities fade away as I hop from place to place. Then, even in my home city, those once strong connections become a few loose strands.

Is There A Rise Of Ghosting?

Kay
September 18th, 2022

Ghosting, the act of seeing a message, application or any form of communication and then never responding. An example would be job applications where the businesses never responds with an accept or reject confirmation. Or finding a sharehouse, where the lister sees your inquiry and then never responds back. They’re countless other examples of ghosting and the thing they have all in common is how frustrating it is for you. You put in time and effort, the least they could do is respond with generic yes or no. Is that so much to ask for? Now for companies, they might be some legal basis, such as preventing evidence on discrimination. But for sharehouse listers? Surely they’d know how frustrating ghosting is, so why inflict those wounds onto others as well?

  Ghosting is not a modern phenomenon, it would’ve been more prevalent with expensive and unreliable communications. If it costs $10 to send a response, would you? There’s a few reasons on the increase of ghosting. First is a power imbalance and winner takes all. If a company has 100 job applications and 1 open position, it doesn’t matter if they don’t respond, they only need 1. Or in the case of sharehouse listing, they’d have multiple interested parties and only need to respond to the 1 who’ll take the house. Second is scale. The sheer volume chews up an extreme amount of time, not sending a rejection email adds up to hours of free time each year.

  Despite ghosting not being a modern phenomenon, it’s rise is partially because there’s virtually no consequences to ghosting anymore. If you didn’t respond with unreliable communications, you could’ve literally died by the time the mail reached you. The inventor of morse code electronic communications made that after sending a letter to his mother, which took weeks, and by then she was already deceased. Before that, in small villages, you could physically see others that didn’t respond to you and they’d be hell to pay without a good reason. Perhaps it’s not a rise, but rather we’re also extremely aware when we’re ghosted, thanks to read receipts.

Our brain on porn | Gary Wilson | Personal Summary And Findings

Kay
August 21st, 2022

Porn is vastly different from real sex and connection. It’s an infinite choice and variety. Pre internet, there was magazines, or erotic text. Realistically, you wouldn’t fap too much to it since there’s not that much choice and would get boring eventually. It’s also slow and more imaginative. Post internet porn is fast, and extremely available. It has every form of sub fetish possible. As such, masturbation tends to be quicker. Then, as we get bored of one type of porn, it goes more and more extreme, into hard core, etc.

  This has real life consequences, like porn induced erectile dysfunction (ED), pre-mature ejaculation, and just not having sex-drive for real human females anymore. Why? Because real females are completely different from porn. They aren’t the hardcore subfetish that your brain got used to. Not to mention they’re only a single choice, when online, you have infinite choice of whatever body matches your current desire. These consequences aren’t talked to as much, because it’s shamed, embarrassing to admit, even to our doctors who are legally obligated to keep details confidential. Ah the penis, the most private part no one wants to serious discuss with anybody. If I were into hardcore porn and got porn-included erectile dysfunction, never being able to have sex with my partner, there’s no way I’d talk about that to ANYBODY. I would break up with my partner, just to not face a daily reminder of my inability.

  Hence why there’s movements like NoFap November, to help those who went too deep in porn recover. Where people have said, after a few months of no stopping porn, they started to recover their porn induced ED, sex drive towards real females and pre-mature ejaculation. Most of the evidence is anecdotes. Somehow I think research would be difficult. What would the advert look like? Questionnaire, if you watch hardcore porn, please apply. Not to mention funding would be problematic, it isn’t exactly mass marketable and displays how advanced and highly regarded a University is…

  It’s likely that porn isn’t the best for us, it has long term consequences on our mental relationships with real females, sex drive and can cause erectile dysfunction. There’s good reason why most porn titles aren’t straight sex, they involve step sisters or something of the like. Watching porn/fapping 5-12 times a week is too damn much, no longer why that guy had problems! Personally, I think reduced porn intake would be the best. Pleasure with minimal consequences. After all, not everyone has a partner, hook-ups take time/effort to arrange and prostitutes are expensive.

The Ultimate Vengeance against a Nation? Leaving.

Kay
July 17th, 2022

All your actions, ultimately, benefit someone somewhere with power. 9/11, a terrorist attack against America by Osama bin Laden. What was his objective again? What was the purpose? All it did was give impetus to military-intelligence complex to pass new sweeping spying laws and start a war. Nothing, truly, changed for the better. Look at protests, what happens? Either it gets ignored, or suppressed completely, like anti-lockdown protests. What happens as a result? New spying laws get introduced and the mainstream media peddle a violent protest narrative. Our actions serve nothing more than ammo to pass bullshit laws. We’ve hit a point in time of self-fulfilling power cycles. That is those in charge help others of similar corrupt deposition remain in power.

  Protests are either ignored, or spun by the media to allow new laws to be passed. One way or another, they’d be utterly suppressed. Violence is not the option, for it’s only met with increased violence, in which the state has a monopoly on. Not to mention it destroys any popular support and give greater powers to the state to pass bullshit laws. Nor are ignorance and silence the answer, for more and more freedom and liberties would be stripped away. Silence, to a certain extent, is agreement.

  The greatest attack, the greatest act of vengeance is to simply leave. To take our tax dollars, take our minds, our talent, our dreams and ambitions towards a new land of freedom and liberties. Without votes, those in power would have to compromise. Without tax money, they can’t pay off people with free shit, turning policies more sensible. Or, have to take in greater bribes, which becomes extremely obvious. Finally, without our minds, our talents, our multiplicative value will be invested into another land. Overtime, the invested value in another land increases, attracting even more minds there, creating a cycle of wealth and knowledge that has been diminished in the home land. All because we decided to take an ultimate act of vengeance against a nation and it’s government.

The Misery of Linear Celebration of Accomplishments

Kay
June 19th, 2022

Don’t celebrate in a linear fashion, otherwise celebrations will slow down to near non-existence. Celebrate the journey with random milestones, ones that aren’t tied to any particular destination.

It’s a natural tendency to celebrate things in a linear fashion. Say you have a youtube channel, so you’d celebrate the 1st view, 10th, 100th, 1,000th, 10,000th, 100,000th, 1,000,000th and so long. Except, this is a terrible idea. Look at how much each increment increases by. Progressively, celebration becomes few and far between. Then what motivation would be left? We constantly get bombarded news of overnight success, or fast rising stars. Too bad that’s not the same for all of us. There’s an availability bias on fast rising stars, everyone wants to report on that. It took Gigguk, the anime youtber, 10 years to reach 1 million subs. In contrast, it took a vtuber a few months to hit 400k. There isn’t as much fanfare for Gigguk’s long and arduous journey. So media gives the illusion of constant overnight success, instead of the slow slow and tedious road towards success.

  With a linear celebration and the illusion of instant success, we’ll all be constant depressed at our slow progress. Instead, celebrate incremental progress and the milestones. Don’t make things about some arbitrary number eons away. Make it small and constant. Instead of 1,000 to 10,000, make it each 1,000 people. Or create our own goals, things that matter and mean something for us. Celebrate along the journey, constantly, to feel it’s a path worth taking, to feel the pride and joy of our accomplishments. Don’t let some random number dictate whether we should celebrate something we take pride in. Don’t let those numbers halt all sense of feeling it reaching it.

  Even for my own podcast and blog, I don’t look at the numbers. No matter what the number is, I’d be disappointed it’s so low. So instead, I celebrate the small things, an interesting topic that episode, how my recording and vocals have improved, or improving my description by learning from other podcasts. In reality, it’s likely that I’ll never earn enough from the podcast or blog to sustain myself. I’ll never have millions upon millions of daily downloads like Joe Rogan. However, that doesn’t mean I can’t have a cake at the 50th episode, to celebrate the long and arduous journey thus far. So take joy in what we do, slowly, surely, and do it constantly with small, non-linear milestones.

Discussion on topics of interest

Kay
June 12th, 2022

A Blog and Podcast can naturally attract people who’re interested in your ideas to discuss with you. Instead of needing to have constant conversations where the other party isn’t interested in your thoughts.

A while ago I read an article that said writing is socialisation for introverts and big thinkers. Nothing bores a big thinker more than small talk, the mundane shit about weather, what Gary or Sue did over the weekend, gossip and rumours. All those are of little consequence. They aren’t intellectually stimulating. After telling some friends about my podcast, they engaged me on the topics. Some agreed, others disagreed and offered counter point. By simply broadcasting my thoughts, others were able to discuss the deeper topics that interested me.

  As we get older and older, continuous or spontaneous meetups rarely do occur. Back in the 1800’s, there was salons people gathered together and talked. That would be a natural avenue to explore ideas and gain insights into others. However, such a thing no longer happens. School is one place, but there’s no going back there. Uni is another, except it only lasts 4 years. After that? Perhaps churches if you’re religious, or maybe public transport. The only time people meetup is when planning an event together, going someplace, parties or meeting up for dinner.

  Since these events are planned well in advance, all parties want to enjoy their time together, for such meetups are precious. This makes talking about big topics a risky gamble. You might need to probe for several different topics before one mutually interests both parties. Not to mention you risk boring them to death if they aren’t interested. A blog helps resolves those issues, the other party would only bring up articles they resonated with or enjoyed. Even asking about what articles they read helps, at least we have an idea what they liked. Since writing is dense, the conversations can begin in earnest.

  Introverted people, on average, aren’t on the spot thinkers, we would have to reflect and think about our words first. Which makes writing the best medium of communication. In person discussions, usually, would revolve around what’s already been said, so there’s no on the spot communication. We’d already have an idea of the topic at hand and can converse fluently on the subject matter.

Broadcasting our thoughts also helps connect with others we never thought shared similar ideas, or were interested in deep thoughts. As we age, making new connections becomes more difficult. In addition, deep thinkers are often alone. Writing, after all, is a very solitary act. Thinking doesn’t happen in a party house with EDM blaring out every night. It happens in solitude. Since the mundane everyday conversations bore us, it’s difficult to find those we connect with. Try meeting someone and ask something like, who are you and what do you want, it’s a bit too heavy. There’s a period where others test the waters, where conversations are naturally lighter.

  Even for myself, I never really talk about deeper topics around others in person. There’s no real catalyst for deeper thoughts, it’s just a fun event surrounded by others. Think about parties, everyone’s talking, and everyone wants to talk to others as well. So the natural time to talk to somebody is reduced. Most topics would be simple and short, that can start and stop at any time without dramatic loss to the overall story. If I never communicated my blog or podcast to others, nobody would know I’m a deep thinker.

Using Weather Manipulation Technologies for Good

Kay
May 15th, 2022

Cloud seeding, a process where iodine is launched into the clouds to attract water molecules, thus create rain. Newer technologies involve drones to emit sparks, these sparks would attract water molecules together to form rain. Drones, unlike cloud seeding, only uses electricity so the cost effectiveness is much higher. This technology is already used in the Middle East, namely Dubai, as there’s virtually no rainfall there.

  New weather shaping technologies have immense potential to reshape our response to severe weather conditions. This includes cloud clearing. In the 2008 Beijing Olympics, China cleared the skies for the opening ceremony, 10 minutes after it rained again. Unlike cloud seeding, this technology isn’t used often, there aren’t many innovations in that space due to lack of interest. However, couldn’t this same technology be used to prevent severe storms or rainfall? In 2022, Australia has experienced flash flooding which damaged or destroyed millions of dollars’ worth of buildings. We already have quite advanced weather detection systems, like seeing a relatively accurate picture of the weather for 14 days all around the world.

  So as soon as there’s a severe weather event, clear the clouds to reduce the potential damage of the storm/rainfall. In theory, since clouds are collections of water molecules that bound together, all we need to do is unbind enough of the clouds before it reaches the storm phase. The costs for research/investment into cloud clearing technologies, although expensive, it’s dwarfed by the immense damage heavy rain/storms can cause to individuals, families, towns and communities.

  Of course, the biggest risk is unforeseen consequences. If we keep clearing storms, then would they come back later in the future with greater ferocity? Bushfires have always been a great problem in Australia, especially with the expanding urban landscape. In the past, bushfires burnt through the land, where trees evolved to grow after a fire. Now, due to artificial suppression of fires, they isn’t regular fires that clear the vegetation and bark. Overtime this built up and up, even mega bushfires erupted, armed with decade’s worth of burnable materials. All because we put bushfires out, to prevent harm to the ever-growing urbanisation.

BELLE: Almost a Masterpiece. Almost

Kay
April 30th, 2022

BELLE, beautiful animation, god tier songs, great writing and packed with emotions. I cried when watching this, it was a touching anime. A touching anime that ALMOST was a masterpiece. You see, this anime tries to do a bit too much for it’s own good. There’s a beauty and the beast element, you see the name Belle, like Bell from Beauty and the Beast, except with an extra e to not get sued 😊. Cancel culture with sponsorships. Constant reactions from the mass internet to see how people pile on others. A silent mass majority that becomes strong when they unite against the tyranny of the minority. There’s a minor romance, and teenage girl feelings.

  All of this in less than 2 hours, yeah, way too much. The fundamental theme throughout the anime was Suzu, the main character, trying to comprehend why her mother would go so far to help a stranger. Everything else, literally everything else, could’ve been cut out and not affect the emotional impact of this movie. In fact, it would’ve strengthen it as more time could’ve been spent on the main story, instead of sub stories.

  The most useless parts of the movie was beauty and the beast and cancel culture man. You see, the beast never ends up with the beauty in the end, so why even include this fairy tale for? In most of the anime, you see Suzu crushing on Hisatake, and dealing with feelings of insecurity due to his popularity. So, if she ended up with the beast, it’d be illogical. Since she didn’t, then the fairy tale has no moral value. Beauty and the Beast exists to say that the beauty can transform the beast into who he could be by seeing past his obvious flaws and exterior. Honestly, I think that was added for the marketing department. Beauty and the beast does sell, the movie cover on my anime list contains them. If you removed that part, there would be no change to the overall story. Sure there needs to be a new way that the beauty meets the beast, but that’s for the better.

  The second part that could be removed was cancel culture man. His powers to unmask people in real life was a bit strange and raised many questions. Like, is he the only one with those powers? Does anyone else have those powers? Why does he have it? He was the main antagonist that drive beauty to meet the beast. For a villain, he had no real good development, and too much screen time to justify the cost. He either needed some serious rewriting or to trim off his scenes, like trimming off the fat, so the movie could get to the real meat.

  In the grand scheme, my complaints don’t make or break the movie. It’s a great film that everyone who likes great writing and anime should watch. I’d give it an almost a masterpiece out of masterpiece if not for all the things mentioned above.

Selection Project: An idol anime that could’ve been much more

Kay
March 13th, 2022

At first, my friend told me to watch this, but I have an allergic relation to idol animes. They’re all the same generic garbage where a bunch of girls sing. However, the first episode blew me away. The ambience, the emotions, the writing and the animation. A little girl that dreamed of singing, being an idol, despite being stuck in hospital. Despite all odds, during high school, she enters SELECTION PROJECT, a show game for training idols. For over 10 years she dreamed of this moment. For over 10 years she’s trained and is a great singer. However, disaster strikes during her performance, stage fright. She lost the popular vote and failed her dream of being an idol. Putting on a strong front to her friends, her family, but alone, she cries. A dream she made over 10 years ago. 10 years’ worth of practice, of ambition, of sacrifice, all gone poof from a single mistake.

 In that moment, SELECTION PROJECT was more than just than an idol anime. What would she do now? Despondent, faking being fine so nobody worries about her. How would she lead her life now that she didn’t become an idol? That was the high point, then everything went downhill. One of the girls in the competition, that won, dropped out and said you deserve it more than me and I’ll make it in America. Thus the asspull happens, the main character will now join SELECTION PROJECT as an idol. She made it, right?

 Later on, as the anime progresses, we get manufactured drama between the 9 idol members. Over the drama sequence, they learn something that changes their mind and everyone makes up. Then they live happily ever after. After the main character became an idol, due to the winner dropping out, SELECTION PROJECT became just another generic idol garbage anime. Sure, it does have good animation and songs, there’s no doubt about that. Except, the story was just like the rest, uninspired, following a formula. In fact, the anime existed to sell the songs!

 Honestly, it’s a tragedy. She didn’t make it to the SELECTION PROJECT to become an idol. She fucked up. Her dreams were crushed. But, would she really let things end like this? Would she really give up a 10 year dream because she failed an audition? At that moment, I wanted her to strive and struggle on to become an idol, despite her failure on the grand stage. I wanted her to try alternate means to become an idol. For me, that was where a true story could’ve happened. Where life isn’t about magically succeeding because you wanted it. Let’s get real here, everyone wants to win, even if you tried everything in your power, you could STILL fail. It’s not when you fail over that matters, but what you do when you’re beaten down, trodden on and laughed upon that truly defines who you are.

 So SELECTION PROJECT is a great generic idol anime about girls who sing and dance. If that’s what you’re into, then watch it, listen to the songs, and enjoy the anime. But if you’re like me, someone who wants to watch something real, where 2d characters transform into something much more. Characters who, despite not existing, feel more real than real life. Who occupy a space in your heart, where you won’t forget their struggle, their hopes, their dreams and how they existed. Then, it’s not an anime for you.

The Potential Consequences of AI-Generated Child Pornography

Kay
March 1st, 2022

Shortly after deepfakes were created, alarms were raised about how it could be used to create fake child pornography (CP). Most of the deepfakes sites have veered away from hosting this type of content, understandable due to the dangerous attention it could bring itself. Despite all the laws, regulations, arrests and website take downs, this CP never ceases to exist. Recently, in 2021, someone in Japan was arrested for owning several CP magazines he bought from Germany. How on earth is that possible? Germany has all the same laws and regulations as other places in regard to CP, yet someone could fly in and out after purchasing a CP magazine.

 Psychopathic serial killers aren’t normal people. They kill obsessively even when it makes no sense to do so. Like how Ted Bundy escaped from prison, only to immediately go back to kill again. Any logical person would at least wait until things cool down again. Society has to grapple with the fact some people are just born with a certain mindset. They didn’t choose to be like this, it’s just nature.

 Perhaps child paedophiles are the same, created due to evolutionary processes gone wrong. Most people act softer around children, like smiling, laughing, or pulling funny faces. Biologically this makes sense. If we were like lions, who cast their cubs into the wilderness to survive, humanity wouldn’t exist today. Then what if this natural tendency to like children went a step too far? So are child paedophiles like psychopaths? Are they inborn or can they be created?

 You can generate non-existent humans with AI. Right now, deepfakes paste faces over existing models. It still requires real people. But soon enough AI can generate entirely fabricated scenes and people, without Hollywood’s multi-million dollar budgets. Then, if someone were to create use AI to create CP, that’s entirely fake, what would happen? Would that still be illegal, even though they aren’t real and doesn’t harm real children? Would the spread of this software actually be beneficial? Due to a rise of fake CP and a dramatic decline of real CP. That is free market economics take over. Or would this create a new generation that thirsts after the real thing?

 Humans can be desensitised to nearly anything, and overtime, go down a deeper and deeper hole. ISIS produced gory videos to normalise violence and it worked quite well in their forces. Such desensitisation occurs within the military and police, eventually being exposed to enough violence results in equally violent retribution to enemies. Porn tends to drift people towards more extreme content, as straight sex becomes tame and boring for them. Just like how marriages become stagnant and partners wish for more sexual variety, usually in the form of cheating.

 Child paedophile is both born and made. Genetic processes might depose a person towards liking children to a disturbing degree. Whilst desensitisation drags others down a rabbit hole that may end up with someone going to Germany to purchase a CP magazine. In the beginning, AI-generated CP would have a positive outcome, children aren’t being harmed in the making of such videos. Eventually, when one doesn’t want the “fake” stuff anymore, they’ll turn to the real sources. With demand, there will ALWAYS be supply. US couldn’t stop physical drugs from entering the country, even with over $1 trillion spent. So how could they prevent digital goods that can’t be stopped with car inspections, sniffer dogs or border security?

I was quite ambivalent about posting this. Notice how I keep using the term, CP? That’s like a safe guard so search engines don’t blacklist my site. It’s said curiosity killed that cat, well, this is my curiosity. A recent article about someone buying a CP magazine kicked this all off, combined with AI, the future will not be so black and white. I didn’t want to do any research into this topic either, as the cost of accidently stumbling onto a CP site is quite severe. In a way, it’s very taboo.

 The fact I’m even writing an article about this raises questions in the eyes of a common man. Why would you even be thinking about this? I would be hesitate to recommend my blog to a friend with this article being on the front page. It’s not the best image for myself. Yet at the same time, if one steers away from topics, isn’t that running blindfolded? Trying to avoid what you see and pretend it doesn’t exist is like Chinese mainlanders who come across an uncomfortable truth about China. A Fal Gong practitioner was handing out pamphlets about the Communist party of China’s treatment of them and the Chinese lady covered her ears, stomped forward and sang loudly to avoid the truth. I don’t want to be like that, even if it’s ugly, I want to see the truth of the world.

Most Frequent Japanese Words from Anime and Dramas

Kay
February 1st, 2022

There’s a theory about learning languages, where you only need the most frequent words in order to convey your ideas. Since 20% of the words make up 80% of word usage according to the paredo distribution. This theory does have validity. Johnny Harris spoke about how he minored in French at Uni and couldn’t even order a baguette in France. That’d be the most depressing realisation, that you wasted 5 years of your life for naught. There’s a quote, 400 words can run a battleship and 800 words can rule the world. Instead of trying to understand all the insane grammar rules, which are quite boring, try to learn to convey your thoughts through stringing words together. He memorised 400 words that he thought would be most used and then constantly talked to a native language speaker.

 However, I’m a software developer, why would I use my pitiful brain and try to think up words, when I can get a definitive list? So, over the week, I analysed the most frequent words in 1,200 Japanese animes and dramas. This list, hopefully, will help you and I be able to understand and speak what we see, feel and hear in the world around us.

From this list, the most frequent word is I 私 (watashi) female form, with 163k counts, then this これ (kore), with 100k counts, and thing; matter 事 (koto), with 100k counts. A tiny bit later, informal I 俺 (ore), with 95k counts.

 Now, what does this tell us? First off, that females talk more or are more frequent in animes/dramas. This isn’t too surprising, the subtitles are mainly from anime’s and female characters bring more viewership/revenue. This is a rather frequent word in normal day use. Thing; Matter; means that objects are constantly referred to. Then informal I is because nobody goes full formal all the time.

The number of frequent words is staggering. English required 800 words, but my list contained 8 thousand words, and that’s the top 10%, not 20%…  See the embedded airtable for the entire file. Of course, this word list is useless unless we start memorise them, at least 1,000, so get going 🙂



Acknowledgements

Many thanks to Ahmed Fasih, who wrote the entire strategy to get Japanese sentences into words and for his assistance.

Dr Yoshinaga Naoki for creating J.DepP and helping when I was getting errors.

Resources

Jp Subtitles See that link for the entire list of Animes/Dramas analysed.

QR Code Scanner... Another one?

Kay
January 12th, 2022

QR Code Scanner

Yes, it’s that time of the year when everyone remakes an existing app that has thousands out there. This time I made a QR Code Scanner that’s entirely web based and can be added to home without installing another app. The limitations are that it more or less only works on Chrome/Chromium based browsers due to using new Web APIs. Furthermore, it’s only for links as it’ll redirect to them immediately.

 Unlike other QR Code scanning apps, that support all QR codes, including text, mine is just for links. By only supporting links, it can redirect immediately to a site, thus being more efficient compared to other apps.

 This was a fun project, the advances in Web APIs make things that were only possible via an app extremely simple. You can even scan barcodes, although my app doesn’t support that, isn’t that amazing?

Check out my QR Code Scanner App.

Completely ad-free, no trackers nothing, just you, the camera and a qr code.

New Year’s Messages

Kay
January 5th, 2022

Happy New Years. All around the world this line is being repeated several million times in a span of 24 hours. It’s said to your friends, family, neighbours and stork clerks. With the rise of digital messaging, many would send out Happy New Year’s messages to those around them as well. I’m the same, every year I send out a Happy New Year’s message to everyone I’ve consistency talked to over the year. I do not know why I’ve done this, but it’s been a practice I’ve followed for the last 8 years.

 As the years pass by, my friend circle dwindles down to nothing. As an overly private person, I don’t make connections easy and after school and University ended, that has become a near impossible task. Last year, after seeing a future with nobody to send Happy New Year messages to, I decided to expand the list to people that I wanted to get to know better as well. Eventually, people will get busy in their lives, without using social media to remind other of your existence, it’ll fade away into dust. A simple greeting with a fun activity you did together, like playing board games, helps refresh your memory of why you continue to hang around them. It also gives a small talking point, so conversation doesn’t immediately die off.

 Every year, I send a New Year’s greeting to everyone I talked to and others I wanted to continue interacting with. Overtime, this list gets smaller and smaller and one day, there’ll be nobody left to message. I hope that this day doesn’t come and my practice of messaging people means I won’t be forgotten. So do you have a similar practice, where you message Happy New Year’s to people? What’s your criteria for messaging others?

Inflating OKR & Goals With Grand Strategy

Kay
December 2nd, 2021

Goals aren’t strategies, don’t get a long todo list mixed up with strategy. Real strategy is achieving a challenge with finite resources, it’s HOW you’ll accomplish something, not the WHAT you want to have done.

Objectives Key Results (OKR), this is a managerial fad that has taken over the world. A majority of companies have these, it could even be disguised under a different name like North Star. These, by themselves, aren’t too bad, it’s better to have some goal rather than none. It also makes it easier for you to get promoted, if you met all these goals, then a payraise or promotion is justified. However, these days they macerade themselves as the grand strategy, the path forward for companies and how they’ll deal with all their competition.

 In reality, these goals are nothing more than a To-Do list with fancy wording to make them sound sophisticated and legit. Anything that’s not immediately achievable is labelled as future goals, thus gives the appearance of a long term strategy. Except, a real strategy is accomplishing a set challenge or task with finite resources, it’s not WHAT we are doing, but HOW are we going to accomplish that.

 Take Intel. After AMD has released several Zen architecture CPUs, they’ve been battered and bruised. As of 2021, AMD’s CPU’s are generally cheaper, use less power and have better specs. Over a decade of monopoly made Intel complacent and they just release a slightly better chip with an insane price, after all, nobody could compete anyway. However, that all changed. Even the laptop segment isn’t safe, where more and more laptop manufacturers include AMD.

 Using OKRs or goals, it’s to beat AMD’s CPUs and regain market share, but that’s just what they need to do. It’s a long laundry list of stuff, what’s even the point of writing that down, it’s fairly obvious. Intel’s strategy is to hire a technical CEO, invest into new chip designs and partially use TSMC manufacturing instead of solely their own. Although it’s somewhat of a to-do list, it’s certainly not a terrible strategy.

 Thus, I implore you to look at your OKR’s, goals and separate what’s just a long list of stuff to do with fancy wording to make managers happy and a real strategy to achieve a challenge or objective with finite resources.

Let’s use this blog as a case study, the end goal would be to produce enough value that 100 – 1,000 people would donate $10 per month. With that amount, I would no longer need a day job to sustain myself. Generally speaking, only a very small percentage of people would donate unless it’s a very tight-knit community.

 Then the goals would be grow the blogs readers, increase the amount of donators or create a dedicated community, much like MrMoneyMustache’s audience. These are not strategies, it’s just a wishlist of things I want to happen. I can’t whip up some motivational post or speech to accomplish this goal. A practice that occurs more and more in companies these days, where the leader sets some ambitious goals, says various placeholder motivational stuff and then expects everyone to accomplish that.

 Let’s take growing the blog’s readers, first I’d need to install website analytics, something that I opted not to have, to gauge how many readers are using the site. Then to see what the typical blog growth looks like, so I have a baseline comparison. After that, I’d need to define what genre my blog will be in, at the moment, it’s everything I have in my mind. But in reality, it’s far better to reduce the scope to a few topics, like philosophy and software development, so the audience knows exactly what they’re getting. All of these is just to set a baseline and create a brand.

 To actually grow the audience, I could post on aggregator blogs to increase exposure, to post to social media sites and reddit. In addition, to create a RSS feed and submit to RSS aggregators, that’ll expand the reach of my blog. Finally, to appear as guest posts of blogs with a similar genres. All of these, although not guaranteed to increase readers, it does increase the number people who would read my articles, and if they’re interested, continue on my blog.

 Now, this isn’t something I’m interested in doing. The entire point of this blog is to not suppress my thoughts, to pander to the market and the like. Instead, it’s to write about whatever interests me and hopefully, someone else would be interested in it as well. A friend of mine asked if I looked at the reader statistics and I said no. What point is there? If there’s 1, I’d get depressed on how few there is, if there’s 100, I’d get depressed that there isn’t as much as I hoped there’d be and this cycle repeats endlessly, even into the millions.


This blog post was based on Good Strategies Bad Strategies by Richard P. Rumelt, I’d recommend you to read it if you’re interested in companies and strategies. Even if you aren’t in a managerial position, at least you know that your company is full of shit and isn’t a long term winner. Thus you can switch boats into one that’ll fly upwards instead of slowly driving itself into the ground. Perhaps it won’t happen in the first 10ish years, but it’ll occur eventually as more and more bullshit gets introduced with zero real world value.

Player Picker: An Easy Way to Select the Start Player

Kay
November 14th, 2021

Visit Player Picker for a easy way to pick the starting player. Just put your finger on the app and then it’ll randomly select a person.

The biggest issue with board games is that picking the first player can be a tough. By nature, humans are political creatures with all forms of alliances, but in a simple and fun board game session, you don’t want to show overt favoritism. However, subconsciously, this can come out. In addition, there’s only so many ways you can decide who goes first, whether it’s by age, birth dates, heights and more. Overtime, it’ll be the same person starting, thus you’d need to constantly come up with new ideas just to pick the first person to start!

 This is where Player picker comes in. All you need to do is place your finger on the app and it’ll randomly decide who starts. It’s designed for up to 8 players, although, in theory, the limit is how many touch inputs Chrome supports. By designed for 8 players, I mean I only added 8 unique colours.

Now, if you’ve already played some board games, you already know these apps exist and they’re quite good, so what’s the difference between mine and all the others? Basically nothing. I just made this because some apps only support 6 players, whilst mine supports 8. Besides that, there’s no real difference. You could even say it’s worse in terms of visual features and animations. The main reason I made this was because I wanted to.

 Instead of installing another app, Player Picker is a web app that can install to your homepage, a Progressive Web App (PWA) as the lingo goes. It was surprisingly difficult to find libraries with multi-touch capabilities I wanted. It doesn’t seem to be that fleshed out. One that I found, Interactjs, hasn’t been updated in months so I don’t know whether the library is still being maintained. In fact, the hard bit was trying to search for and use multi-touch libraries because I didn’t want the hassle of native touch fuckery. In the end, I had to use native touch fuckery anyway because existing libraries didn’t have what I wanted. That was the most frustrating developer experience I ever had.

Why would I create an app that already exists and its done better? What value does that have? My question is if it always NEEDS to be valuable to others to have value. For me, the app has infinte value for it was an amusing and worthwhile development experience. Messing around with multi-touch and Progressive Web Apps taught me a lot. Now, it’s not going to be an app many people use, for most people, whether it’s a PWA or something downloaded from the app stores doesn’t matter. But, for me, not needing to install an overly bloated app, having everything run as the web is great. An app is extremely unnecessary for such a simple application. All it needs is touch capabilities and animation, something that existed for years in the web. In the future, it’ll be completely offline and hosted statically, meaning I won’t pay a cent for it, thus will remain online for as long as the CDN exists.

 On a side note, isn’t it amusing how overly philosophical I needed to get to justify creating an app for fun?


Starting Player Picker

The Beginnings and End of my Game Development Phase

Kay
October 29th, 2021

Check out my new text-based game: Text Based Novel Game, Anti Destiny Storyteller!

In order to retire, I must find methods of generating income and one such method was to make a text based game. The idea was to start with a basic text game and then gradually improve upon it. Eventually creating an AI variant, similar to AI Dungeon. In my foolish mind, this would be simple task and wouldn’t take too long. Oh how wrong I was.

 A US Navy general remarked that you should not integrate more than 2 new technologies into a ship, anymore becomes widely expensive to get running. Considering that the US’s newest aircraft carrier has blown it’s budget, doubling the billions spent, I’d say he’s correct. 5 new technologies were far too much and the results speak for themselves.

As someone who watches anime, Visual Novels were the original game type, where it’s a bunch of images with text flicking through. That would’ve been perfect, except I can’t draw nor want to spend the enormous funds to draw hundreds or thousands of images. Thus I stuck to text-based. The new technologies here was designing a text-based game, using React/NextJS for the website and then writing a story. It turns out creating a good game and story is no easy task, so much that my initial dreams of an AI powered text-based game went into flames. To add AI when I was already struggling with the existing technologies would be a death sentence.

 Without any external motivation in terms of funds, everything is quite dependent on my internal willpower. To have the game stalled for weeks due to figuring out tech would kill any motivation and thus the entire project would die. For it’s very easy to start things, when everything’s new and fresh, when all the simple things take less than an hour to complete. Each completed task is another burst of inspiration to keep going. However, as time ticks on, tasks no longer become so easy, so simple. Fatigue, boredness and motivation plummets to nothing.

Thus, making something simple first, and keeping the new tech to a minimum is the only way to keep that internal fire going and create something. So this is the basis of my text-based game. The story is what you seen in the last post. The gameplay is reading. What mattered here was the tech, which would eventually result in the AI version. So please do checkout my text-based novel game.

https://linear-text-novel.vercel.app/

The Beginnings of a Potential Short Story

Kay
October 24th, 2021

After reading an excessive amount, I was always interested in writing a story. Except, it takes an insane amount of work to create something at least half decent. I wasn’t going to try, until I kept reading bad story after story, with terrible development, characters and especially token roles. Where one is defined by their sex and features. So, to spite them, I tried to create my own version that was better… Yeah nah, I realise why those stories are so generic, because how damned difficult it is to create a good story!

So here’s my attempt, I hope you can have a read.

Anti-Destiny Hero

Chapter 1


All my life I have been told what I cannot be. All my life people never viewed me as me, but rather as handicapped girl that needs help. Nobody has ever seen me as me. I almost felt the same way, that all I’ll ever amount to is a handicapped girl that people give pity to. Everything changed when a saw that hero, who took down all the bad guys with a smile on his face. It was at that moment I wanted to be a hero and told everyone I knew. But, nobody thought that was possible. For them, a hero isn’t someone in a wheelchair. My parents encouraged me with hidden pity, they didn’t’ believe me and just didn’t want to hurt my feelings. Some of my friends were bemused, “You want to become a hero?” they joked, barely able to suppress their laughter.

Others snarled, “You can’t even get up a flight of stairs yourself, who are you going to save?”, “When someone gets robbed and runs up the stairs, what then? Will you angry tell them to come down?”

From that day onward, I decided to become a hero, no matter what other people say. Even if I’m in a wheelchair, even if I’m a girl, does it matter? I want people to see me as who I choose to become, not what I was born with.

Well, even as I say that, there isn’t too much heroic actions in my day to day life. On my way to University, sometimes I encounter guys hitting on a girl that’s clearly uncomfortable. “Hey, buzz off, she ain’t interested in you lot” I shout. They look around to see who said that and can never see me at first. “Uncomfortable? Impossible, she’s having the time of her life with us” Carl scoffs. I never do manage to convince them, but it gives enough time for the girl to slip away. Carl and co gets a little mad but they don’t do anything to me. As much as I hate to be defined as a wheelchair girl, it is awfully convenient at times.

Behind the veil of benign day to day actions, there is evil larking in the shadows. My University was packed with people till recently, then everyone disappeared off to somewhere. Eavesdropping on others, I pick up strange rumours. “Did you hear that Noah got addicted on Fizz? He hasn’t left his room in weeks now” replied Lane in hushed tones. Leigh nervously looked around and sharply remarked, “Don’t talk about it anymore, you know it’s illegal to take or even discuss drugs in Domni. Just last month some people that were discussing Fizz publicily were pulled away by some dangerous looking people.” It doesn’t seem real though, how could people even get Fizz when drugs are so illegal?

Either way, I ignore those comments and continue to my Mechanical Engineering course. “Hey Kay, made new changes to your ride again?” Isabel beemed. “Of course”, I replied, “Just added some a small motor to my wheels to go a bit faster. It’s not done yet though.” Isabel went full on geek mode on me, asking what the power is and how long it’ll last, you see, she helps me with these modifications. She also knows that I want to be a hero, so it’s a blessing to have someone like her. Even though I’m bound to these wheels, it doesn’t mean the cheapest wheelchair is what I’ll be suck with for the rest of my life. I’m not adding spikes the the wheels like a chariot, nor do I have that much skills, it’s just enough to try out different ideas, which sometimes fails.

After that class was over, I groaned to Isabel, “Finally it’s done, that was a grueling 2 hours.” “Casey really is an intense lecturer, always going so fast! Were you going to finish off your motor changes now” Isabel commented. “Definitely, let’s head to the mechanical workshop now” I stated.

The Beginnings of a Potential Short Story

Kay
October 24th, 2021

After reading an excessive amount, I was always interested in writing a story. Except, it takes an insane amount of work to create something at least half decent. I wasn’t going to try, until I kept reading bad story after story, with terrible development, characters and especially token roles. Where one is defined by their sex and features. So, to spite them, I tried to create my own version that was better… Yeah nah, I realise why those stories are so generic, because how damned difficult it is to create a good story!

So here’s my attempt, I hope you can have a read.

Anti-Destiny Hero

Chapter 1


All my life I have been told what I cannot be. All my life people never viewed me as me, but rather as handicapped girl that needs help. Nobody has ever seen me as me. I almost felt the same way, that all I’ll ever amount to is a handicapped girl that people give pity to. Everything changed when a saw that hero, who took down all the bad guys with a smile on his face. It was at that moment I wanted to be a hero and told everyone I knew. But, nobody thought that was possible. For them, a hero isn’t someone in a wheelchair. My parents encouraged me with hidden pity, they didn’t’ believe me and just didn’t want to hurt my feelings. Some of my friends were bemused, “You want to become a hero?” they joked, barely able to suppress their laughter.

Others snarled, “You can’t even get up a flight of stairs yourself, who are you going to save?”, “When someone gets robbed and runs up the stairs, what then? Will you angry tell them to come down?”

From that day onward, I decided to become a hero, no matter what other people say. Even if I’m in a wheelchair, even if I’m a girl, does it matter? I want people to see me as who I choose to become, not what I was born with.

Well, even as I say that, there isn’t too much heroic actions in my day to day life. On my way to University, sometimes I encounter guys hitting on a girl that’s clearly uncomfortable. “Hey, buzz off, she ain’t interested in you lot” I shout. They look around to see who said that and can never see me at first. “Uncomfortable? Impossible, she’s having the time of her life with us” Carl scoffs. I never do manage to convince them, but it gives enough time for the girl to slip away. Carl and co gets a little mad but they don’t do anything to me. As much as I hate to be defined as a wheelchair girl, it is awfully convenient at times.

Behind the veil of benign day to day actions, there is evil larking in the shadows. My University was packed with people till recently, then everyone disappeared off to somewhere. Eavesdropping on others, I pick up strange rumours. “Did you hear that Noah got addicted on Fizz? He hasn’t left his room in weeks now” replied Lane in hushed tones. Leigh nervously looked around and sharply remarked, “Don’t talk about it anymore, you know it’s illegal to take or even discuss drugs in Domni. Just last month some people that were discussing Fizz publicily were pulled away by some dangerous looking people.” It doesn’t seem real though, how could people even get Fizz when drugs are so illegal?

Either way, I ignore those comments and continue to my Mechanical Engineering course. “Hey Kay, made new changes to your ride again?” Isabel beemed. “Of course”, I replied, “Just added some a small motor to my wheels to go a bit faster. It’s not done yet though.” Isabel went full on geek mode on me, asking what the power is and how long it’ll last, you see, she helps me with these modifications. She also knows that I want to be a hero, so it’s a blessing to have someone like her. Even though I’m bound to these wheels, it doesn’t mean the cheapest wheelchair is what I’ll be suck with for the rest of my life. I’m not adding spikes the the wheels like a chariot, nor do I have that much skills, it’s just enough to try out different ideas, which sometimes fails.

After that class was over, I groaned to Isabel, “Finally it’s done, that was a grueling 2 hours.” “Casey really is an intense lecturer, always going so fast! Were you going to finish off your motor changes now” Isabel commented. “Definitely, let’s head to the mechanical workshop now” I stated.

The Potential Collapse of Chinese Anime

Kay
October 7th, 2021

Chinese government mandates stories to conform with acceptable Chinese Communist values, thus making anime boring. Boring anime = no watchers = no money = dead industry.

Japanese wares used to be seen as low quality, garbage where the only redeeming factor is the cheap price. But, overtime, their production quality rose higher and higher until today. Where Japanese goods are known for it’s high quality.

 The same story is playing out for China, they used to produce absolute garbage, but it was cheap so everyone bought it. As time goes on, as more money flows in, manufacturing processes are improving to a point where the only low quality products are from dodgy suppliers.

How does this relate to anime you ask? Anime is following the very same trend, it started off as hot garbage and nowadays, it’s decent. Still seen with a stigma of low quality, but evidence of improvements is obvious. The 3D animations isn’t pixar quality yet, the 2D animations still haven’t perfected the art as of now. However, it’s only a matter of time.

 Then, isn’t it strange to say the Chinese anime studios may collapse? After all, the trends are obvious, the population and thus money is free flowing. What could possibly stop such a giant? Itself, yes that’s right, China itself could cause the collapse of Chinese anime. You see, the Chinese government has been ramping up it’s socialist policies and propaganda. Games like Playeruknown’s BattleGrounds required changes to “support the Chinese communist values.” That’s a real story by the way. But people aren’t going to sit there and watch propaganda. Given ones free choice, people will always gravitate towards the most interesting stories and forcefully embedding communist into stories isn’t interesting.

The extreme ramp up of imbuing stories with acceptable Chinese Communist values will reduce the enjoyment of stories. Without people activity enjoying the underlying stories, there’ll be no money to be made in Chinese anime. No money means no talent, no training, no researching the latest techniques. So the Chinese government, by making stories boring due to forceful propaganda, may cause the anime industry to die before it truly blooms. The novel industry is another target, with some post-apocalyptic stories had to revise the year of the demise because of the Communist Party’s 5 year technological superiority plan.

The Potential Collapse of Chinese Anime

Kay
October 7th, 2021

Chinese government mandates stories to conform with acceptable Chinese Communist values, thus making anime boring. Boring anime = no watchers = no money = dead industry.

Japanese wares used to be seen as low quality, garbage where the only redeeming factor is the cheap price. But, overtime, their production quality rose higher and higher until today. Where Japanese goods are known for it’s high quality.

 The same story is playing out for China, they used to produce absolute garbage, but it was cheap so everyone bought it. As time goes on, as more money flows in, manufacturing processes are improving to a point where the only low quality products are from dodgy suppliers.

How does this relate to anime you ask? Anime is following the very same trend, it started off as hot garbage and nowadays, it’s decent. Still seen with a stigma of low quality, but evidence of improvements is obvious. The 3D animations isn’t pixar quality yet, the 2D animations still haven’t perfected the art as of now. However, it’s only a matter of time.

 Then, isn’t it strange to say the Chinese anime studios may collapse? After all, the trends are obvious, the population and thus money is free flowing. What could possibly stop such a giant? Itself, yes that’s right, China itself could cause the collapse of Chinese anime. You see, the Chinese government has been ramping up it’s socialist policies and propaganda. Games like Playeruknown’s BattleGrounds required changes to “support the Chinese communist values.” That’s a real story by the way. But people aren’t going to sit there and watch propaganda. Given ones free choice, people will always gravitate towards the most interesting stories and forcefully embedding communist into stories isn’t interesting.

The extreme ramp up of imbuing stories with acceptable Chinese Communist values will reduce the enjoyment of stories. Without people activity enjoying the underlying stories, there’ll be no money to be made in Chinese anime. No money means no talent, no training, no researching the latest techniques. So the Chinese government, by making stories boring due to forceful propaganda, may cause the anime industry to die before it truly blooms. The novel industry is another target, with some post-apocalyptic stories had to revise the year of the demise because of the Communist Party’s 5 year technological superiority plan.

A New Blog

Kay
October 1st, 2021

With this article, my blog has officially came to life!!!

I’ve wanted to create a blog for over a year now and have been started and stopped numerous times. Sometimes I gained a mad burst of inspiration and really hammer down. But this feeling would inevitably fizzle out and die.

 My day job is technically a web developer so I thought this would extremely easy. Just need to sit my ass down and whip something up, but it wasn’t. You see, I wanted to use new technologies and new methods and all that shit. So I researched, tried, found it’s too damn hard and then played some games instead. This process repeated for months and months.

Why did I suddenly start now? Time has been accelerating for me, I cannot be stuck on this blog and leave all my other ideas to the wayside. Thus I tried to make things simple as possible

 But Kay, why even bother create your own site? There’s so many easy ways to get a blog out there these days. Hell, you don’t even need to code, use Medium or Substack and boom, instant blog. Why waste over a year, fucking around, instead of using existing options?

There’s this side of me that likes creating things, likes the thrill and the challenge. Sure I could do some clickty click and get my writings out there. If I didn’t use Medium or Substack, there’s Wordpress and Shopify to use. Why bother creating something that already exists?

 There’s a danger in that logic, everything in the world has already been created, eventually you’ll never create anything. But that knowledge isn’t yours, you don’t know how to create a website, create that blog, use Laravel, Vue and hack up a CMS. Only by creating can you transform what is in your head to the world. Also, it’s fun. Just using a premade solution is boring, there’s create joy in the craft of things.


So that's the story on how I took over 2 years, dicking around, really not doing much, constantly restarting the project, to create my simple ass blog.